The Personal Side of Bias, Prejudice, and Oppression
This incident took place
about three years ago. I was returning
to my classroom (infants 6wks-12 months) and saw a caregiver from the adjoining
classroom standing inside the half-door talking to one of the providers
assigned to my room. I signed in and entered
the room. As I was entering I heard the
visiting provider say “Ooooohhhh, look he’s gay” and she proceeded to
laugh. I look in the direction she was
looking and saw an infant lean over and kiss another infant on the face. The two providers were still giggling. I looked in their direction and the one from
my classroom got very quiet and looked away.
I took a deep breath, tried to control my anger, and proceeded to tell
the visiting provider to leave my classroom.
She started to question me as to why and I informed her that what she
had said was inappropriate, offensive, and mean. She said that she was only joking. I also told her that a person’s sexual orientation
was not the topic for inside the classroom environment or a joke to most people. She tried to bring religion and sin into the
conversation. I told her that she needed
to leave and did not need to return to my classroom with her small-minded and
judgmental comments. She got upset and
left.
What this person
described as joking was an attack against a defenseless infant. The infant may not have understood the words
and probably won’t consciously remember the incident; but he certainly felt the
negativity surrounding the incident. I
did not allow the incident to get out of control and tried to resolve it
quickly and move on; but it did take place.
The fact that a person with these views, a complete lack of
professionalism, and very little early childhood knowledge is working with
children full time is very upsetting.
She made no effort to hide her views and saw no fault with her actions,
only with me calling her on her behavior and asking her to leave and not come
back.
I reported
this incident and did not hear of any repercussions to the employee. She continued to work full time with children
and did not feel the need to check her behavior. I have spoken to her on more than one
occasion in defense of children and/or families. The risk for ongoing emotional and
psychological damage is the way in which equity is diminished. We are in a profession that needs to build up
children, not tear them down with ignorance and prejudice.
This incident brought up feelings of anger, disgust,
and sadness both with this person and the management’s handling of the
situation. I was actually viewed as
over-reacting in this situation. I feel
that the responsibility we have as early childhood professionals and providers
holds us to a certain standard. I feel
strongly that a person who displays these types of bias, prejudice, and
inappropriate, damaging behavior should be removed from working with children.
In order for an incident such as this to be turned
into an opportunity for greater equity management should have taken a very firm
position against this type of behavior from an employee. If reprimand is not effective, then a person
should be dismissed. I feel that a
standard should be set for what is acceptable and will be tolerated or
not. By allowing this type of behavior,
it has been condoned and will continue.
I was told when I questioned the handling of the incident that it was
not able to be shared with me and not my concern. To build equity we must be responsible,
competent, and dedicated to our profession.
Not everyone who enters this profession should be allowed to stay. Children and families are depending upon us
to fulfill our responsibilities and trust us to care for their children. An equitable early childhood system will put
the well-being of children before the feelings and needs of those working
within it.
Cindy, I would have told the parents of the infants, because like you said this type of behavior should not be tolerated especially by a worker in a child care setting. If the parents knew about this, they might have been able to get this person reprimanded more severely, and the possibility of more training for the individual. No professional should make any child feel uncomfortable, if they do they either had little training or no training at all.
ReplyDeleteHi Larry, Thank you for your response. Unfortunately I have been in this situation before and any attempt to inform parents of this type of behavior is viewed as causing trouble and often ends with the person being pulled into the office for a reprimand themselves. Since the parent did not witness the incident firsthand it is considered second hand knowledge. They insist that we follow protocol and go through them. So I did the best that I could by speaking to her, reporting it to management and not allowing her into my classroom. And unfortunately for some individuals all of the training in the world will not make a difference if they do not view working with children as important as it really is. Once again, thank you for your comments. Cindy Ferguson
DeleteCindy,
ReplyDeleteI can't believe someone would actually do that! She definitely should have been reprimanded. It's so frustrating when people say awful things and then call it a joke to justify their behavior.
Melissa
Hi Melissa, Thank you for your comments. It is very frustrating and unfortunately as I said, not a lone incident. There are so many wonderful providers out there, but these are the type that do such damage to the profession and children. There is such a need for some type of system in place to prevent these types from entering the field or once recognized, to be removed. Working with children is a privilege and responsibility and not everyone is suited to this profession. Once again, thank you for your comments. Cindy Ferguson
DeleteThings like this happen all the time and they seem to just go unnoticed. So thank you for your efforts to help the children she hurts. I have worked with many teachers who would say inappropriate things about the children within their earshot but would act like they could not hear or understand. The children could feel the tension and that affects them. It is sad that these type of people are in this profession, but hopefully we can educate our coworkers and peers and we can help change the profession into something more positive.
ReplyDeleteHi Jennifer, Thank you for your comments. I completely agree. My hope is to continue on and do as much good as I can while trying to raise the awareness of the critical nature of our profession and some of the injustices that are occurring on a regular basis. It is far to easy to enter this area of work and seems too difficult to remove those that are not suited. Once again thank you for your comments. Cindy Ferguson
DeleteCindy,
ReplyDeleteI hate that happened and I am very glad that you were able to control your anger towards the visitor and professional who laughed. I don't think that those comments are appropriate in the early childhood settings and I feel that the employee should have been reprimanded and understand how offensive that comment really is. Thanks for sharing.
Hi Jasmyn, Thank you for your comment. Controlling my emotion is something that I have to work at when children and families are concerned. I find that with time, it is getting a little easier to do. It is difficult to understand how these people can feel good about themselves when acting in these ways, but all we can do is try to correct them and be there to protect the children from their influence in possible. Once again, thank you for your comment. Cindy Ferguson
ReplyDeleteI agree that going to the parents is not the best way to handle such a situation. Perhaps a comment in response such as "he is being very gentle and caring towards his friend" or "he is demonstrating an age and developmentally appropriate expression of affection towards a peer" would have redirected the giggles of the offending coworkers.
ReplyDelete~Lora
Hi Cindy,
ReplyDeleteMaintaining a high professional standard is important at all times. We have had the opportunity to learn some valuable information about diversity and respecting each other. There is a need for us to teach individuals who I guess are willing to learn and change their behaviour. Mentoring is also necessary to help others lift their standard.
Thanks
Vanessa